Eclipsed, Totally





It seems that we have a once in a lifetime astronomy event… every so often. Always hearing about the stars being close to the moon and the moon being close to the sun blah blah blah blah.

The event coming up soon has more people excited than when Neil Armstrong walked on the moon.

It's been 99 years since we have had a totality eclipse. I hate to say this but I actually learned a new word. I had no idea what totality meant, but I do now. They are even selling t-shirts with “totality” on it.

We have the man in the moon, Moon over Miami, Michael Jackson’s Moonwalk, and we tell our grandkids we love them to the moon and back!

It's almost as exciting in St. Louis as when the Cardinals last won the World Series.

There has been a run on porta potties. If you waste too much time in one of those you'll miss the whole two minute deal. Better bring your own toilet paper just in case.

Highways will be jammed, cell phone usage will be limited. Bring your own bottles of water and plenty of them. Anybody and everybody who can make a buck out of this is doing so. I heard that some of the special glasses being sold are fake. Not surprising, in this period of fake news why shouldn't they have fake glasses?

You have to make sure you put the glasses on right or all will be for naught. No peeking. A little peek can scar your eye tissues for life.

The hospitals in these high traffic areas are preparing for all sorts of disasters. Waiting in the hospital ER is not a picnic, another blog coming on this, and I can imagine that the wait times from this totality eclipse will be unbelievable.

People who get in fights, trip, and eat bad food, anything can happen. Bring a first aid kit with you, you never know when you may need it.

They said this totality eclipse will do strange things to the animals. The birds will chirp, the dogs may howl. God only knows what my cats will do. Probably sleep in front of the TV like they always do. We’ll keep you posted on that.

When my mom was in the nursing home the care givers said they could always tell when it was a full moon because the residents went a little nuts. God only knows what this is going to do to the rest of the population.

I can imagine people being pulled over for speeding or armed robbery or worse, and blaming it on the totality eclipse. I can hear it now… temporary totality eclipse insanity! Will that hold up in court? We will have to see.

I just heard that people are calling the nuns asking them if this could be the end of days (not the soap opera) or if this could be the second coming. Of who I have no idea.

The nun said people believe they have a closer connection to the “man upstairs” as my mom use to say.

I guess I must be crazy but that's sure is a lot of to do over nothing.

Who in their right mind wants to drive in endless traffic for hours to go to some of these places where the population will be five times the normal size? Prices for anything and everything will be sky high for a two minute view.

Police will be over worked. Ambulances lined up. The cost to these cities must be "astronomical".

What if it's cloudy that day, can you imagine? I can see the headlines now... Man sues City of Chesterfield for spending a fortune to see the moon cross the sun for two minutes and the clouds cover it up.

I told someone I was going to stay home and watch it on TV. They said, “But it's not the same as being there!”

Yes it's better. No nasty people, car lines, fumes and road rage. I can make my own popcorn, have my own drink, put my feet up, and won't have to wear sunglasses in my comfortable chair, life is good.




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