Older and Better with Shelly

I remember when I was a kid the telephone was scarcely used. It was meant for emergency situations. It was a treat if you even could afford one. My parents had what was called a four party line and entertainment for me was listening in on other peoples’ conversations. Of course I was too young to know what they were talking about at the time but just knowing I was doing something naughty was thrilling. I remember when my aunts would travel they would want to let my mom know that they got to their destination without an issue.   However, to make a long distance call was extremely expensive. So they would make a collect call through the operator and ask for the dog’s name or kid’s name, and then my mom would say they’re not home. That was the signal to let my mom know they had safely arrived at their destination. As people become wealthier they were actually able to have their own phone with their own line. My parents had a phone in the kitchen with only a 1...

Since most of the people that read my blog are known by the dreaded word “boomers” I thought I would get the word out to speak for us. I always thought baby boomers were special. We were going to change the world. And we did for the better. Our music was the best, our clothing was great. We knew how to have fun. We were never going to get old. For a long time I said boomers rule. Well the unbelievable thing happened, we actually somehow got old. I never use that word “old”. In fact, for over 20 years the AARP has been trying to get me to join but I won’t. Why would I want to admit to being old. Old is a state of mind if you ask me. You can do whatever you want, whenever you want to, within reason as you age. So a few weeks ago I read about a phrase called OK Boomer and it was derogatory. Well that got my boomer rage up. So of course I googled it. Isn’t that what you do every day about something you don’t know? Well I got more pissed as I read it. It seems the kids ...

OK I wanted to do this for a long time. But I don’t want to ignite a riot over one of my blogs. But I couldn’t hold it in any longer. Don’t want to offend anybody but here I go… For years people have debated who are smarter cats or dogs? Of course whatever animal you have, you think he or she is the more brilliant one. I’ve had cats for 50+ years and I can tell you, they’re smarter. They’re smarter than a fifth grader, they’re smarter than humans, they are smarter than anybody. Who else do you know who can lounge around, sleep most of the day, and not get a heart condition, diabetes or just fat? Who do you know that can throw up at will and have somebody clean up after them? Who do you know that is allowed to share your bed with you, and even sleep on your head? Who do you know that can convince you with two soulful eyes to share your dinner with them, after they’ve had their own. Who do you know that when they cry like a baby they get immediate at...

The worst thing happened to me today. The absolute worst. I was demoted to a “green” status by Starbucks. They’re right on the corner by our house and I do frequent them. But I didn’t get 300 stars this year so I’m demoted. How dare they do that to me? I bought their stock back in the day before people even knew who they were. The new Starbucks on the corner, about a half-a-mile-away, must’ve been designed by someone who flunked out of architectural school. You have to drive into and out of the adjacent shopping center parking lot, turn to get back to the main busy street, then turn back into the Starbuck’s designated area lot to wait in line. Then to leave you have to do it all in reverse.  So much traffic you can nearly lose your life just to get your damn coffee. Did I give up, no! I continued to go to that navigationally challenged Starbucks. I’m not a quitter. I never give up. I’m up to the challenge. Almost avoiding death on more than one occasion just to...

Where did you go to high school? I did not realize that question was a coined phrase seemingly originating and owned by St. Louisans. Growing up we all pretty much stayed in our neighborhoods, shopped in our neighborhoods and had friends in our neighborhood. Transportation wasn't easy back then and not everyone had a car. You wanted to live in the area where both your family and your school were close by. Back in the day St. Louis had its own geographic divisions separated by wealth and religion. Certain religions, and certain races, were not allowed to live in some areas. Was it fair, no, could we do anything about it at the time, not much. The area was separated by those that went to private school, the very wealthy, or were Catholic. That was that. So when you met somebody from St. Louis and you asked where they went to high school that immediately told you the financial status of their family and maybe their religion. I never looked on...

I'm not a big shopper, never have been. When I was a kid my Mom used to run to the store and buy stuff. Then, the next day, she would return it. I made a promise at a young age that I would not follow in her footsteps. When I bought something it wasn't getting returned unless there was a very good reason. Fast forward years later and along comes the mall. It was a wonderful place for people to meet, take walks, eat out and go to the movies. In cold-weather states it was great. You would park and go in, and you could be entertained for the day. Or, in the heat of summer, you could stay cool. You might just get a cup of coffee, wander around, and meet your friends. I went to my neighborhood mall today. I hadn't been in a few months. The big major department store that has been there for maybe 30 years, or more, was empty. I never thought that I would be so sad. I walked around and all of these sales people were running after me trying to help me. I'm ...

I am calling for a text free weekend. No not a tax free weekend, like we have now, but going two days totally “text free”. Do you think we could survive a whole weekend without texting? My grandchildren would have to be admitted to the hospital for having a nervous breakdown. My son would be following right in their footsteps. So… walking down the street you could actually look at people as they walk by instead of bumping into them. Remember those days? Can you imagine going to a restaurant and seeing people actually talking?  Could they have a conversation for an hour without pulling out their phone? Heaven forbid. Some of the biggest text abuse occurs while waiting in line to give your order at a coffee shop. Ever have to wait for somebody in front of you to finish their texting so they can give the waitress their order? Many slow down the check out in the grocery line by finishing their texting before they place their goods on the conve...