A Real Survivor Kit For The Quarantined

Now that the Coronavirus has hit the US, federal agencies have provided a list of all the necessities you need to have in case of a quarantine or a shut-in scenario.

Not to make light of the situation, but I put together my own list of what really is a necessity.

First is coffee and the accoutrements. Think of how crabby we will all be shut in with our immediate loved ones without coffee. That could lead to brutality.

Second, make sure TV and cable actually work. All plug-ins need to be in working order. Have a stash of DVDs on-hand.  Do they even make those anymore?  You can watch them if you get totally bored.

Now every time we have a calamity we have hundreds if not thousands of babies born nine months later. Thinking ahead, if you don’t want to add to your family I don’t need to tell you what to do about it.

Keep books, books and more books nearby. If you have to entertain yourself TV will get tiring after a couple hours per day. Reading a book may actually be more entertaining. However don’t get them at the library because you may not be able to return them very soon, although I hear you don’t have to pay fines anymore.

Snacks are a must-have. Now I could devote a whole column to that alone.

Lots of munchies to choose from. Whether they are sweet, salty sweet or just salty. Granola bars work fine if you’re not hungry and just want a meal replacement.

Popcorn should be on the list. Though do something healthy and stay away from the microwave stuff. Pop your own.  You’ll have plenty of time. Don’t forget butter, salt, or butter spray or whatever else you usually put on your favorite kernels.

If your family likes peanut butter you can stock up on that it too. It goes on everything and it’s ok to use on lots of consumable goods.

Milk for your coffee or cereal is another must. Here’s where it gets tricky. You can have whole milk, 2%, 1% or skim. Then there’s almond milk, soy milk, and our personal new favorite, milk made of oats.

A super, duper big can of oatmeal should also be in the pantry. You can actually go online and find a recipe to make your own oat milk. That may keep you busy for a while.

Then you need all kinds of “ad-ins”.

What is an ad-in you say? It is jars of different kinds of nuts, seeds, and dried fruit. Keep them in containers with lids so they stay fresh. All those ad-ins will make anything taste yummy.

 You can add them in to salads, stir fries, cookies, and homemade granola.

If you’re a baker, stock up on all kinds of products you need to create. Print out lots of recipes to keep you busy. Make sure your freezers are somewhat empty because you’re going to be freezing a lot of stuff.

Clothes are really a necessity. We’re talking lots of jeans and tops. Should the weather warm-up you can at least go outside, get some sunshine and sit on your patio or back deck. Otherwise everybody’s going to look like they just got out of prison. And don’t forget the sunscreen.

Hope you like your neighbors because they may be your best forms of social contact, whether you shout at them across the fence or through a window.

Last but not least, if you don’t want to gain 20 pounds or more, make sure you have a way to exercise. Tapes, videos, treadmills, machines, exercise bands and more will all be useful if you wish to retain your current shape.

If you have young kids I feel sorry for you. No advice here.