Older and Better with Shelly

Well somewhere in the last election cycle, not mentioning any names, the term Fake News evolved. This is not a political column so I will not speak on that subject. There’s much to be said but I am refraining myself. So now when a newspaper or television station prints or says something not to the liking of a political candidate they call it “Fake News”. Fake News has been around for centuries. When I was at the supermarket last week waiting in the check-out line there were lots of different magazines on the rack. Side-by-side one magazine said that Brad and Angelina called off their divorce. The magazine next to it said Brad was engaged to someone else. Who reads this stuff and who believes it anyway? This is really Fake News.  I can see the children of today telling their folks when they get into trouble at school it's Fake News. I wonder if Fake News will be considered a form of defense in a court of law. I'll have to research that one and ge...

An old cat lady, me? Nah! My mother told me cats were nasty animals that they were dirty and they scratched people. I had that fear my whole childhood… and beyond. When my kids were young, and we lived in an apartment, they begged me for a pet. Our bird had died and a lot of the people in the apartments had cats because they were inside animals. Dogs were not allowed. We were offered a baby cat when the kids were little, and we adopted her. We named her Sugar and she was a sweetheart, at least in the beginning. I figured I wouldn't get attached to this thing because my mother made me scared to death of them. I thought I could feed her and she would be the kids pet. Well I learned very quickly that you don't adopt a cat, they adopt you. And the more you don't like them the more they want you. Sugar became my cat very quickly. She slept with me, she followed me around, and, if anybody got to close to me, she growled and whacked them. Before lo...

It seems that we have a once in a lifetime astronomy event… every so often. Always hearing about the stars being close to the moon and the moon being close to the sun blah blah blah blah. The event coming up soon has more people excited than when Neil Armstrong walked on the moon. It's been 99 years since we have had a totality eclipse. I hate to say this but I actually learned a new word. I had no idea what totality meant, but I do now. They are even selling t-shirts with “totality” on it. We have the man in the moon, Moon over Miami, Michael Jackson’s Moonwalk, and we tell our grandkids we love them to the moon and back! It's almost as exciting in St. Louis as when the Cardinals last won the World Series. There has been a run on porta potties. If you waste too much time in one of those you'll miss the whole two minute deal. Better bring your own toilet paper just in case. Highways will be jammed, cell phone usage will be limited. Bring y...

My friends have made fun of me for years about my soap opera addiction. I'm currently down to one. I never stay home to watch it, I tape it. What most people don't realize is that most of the popular network programs are various forms of soap operas… but they call them dramas. What is Downton Abby? It's a sophisticated English drama. It has all the good makings of a good soap opera. Downton is a great story with interesting characters, good drama, happy, sad and the all-important cliff hanger. A rose by any other name is still a rose. Downtown Abby took place almost 100 years ago and it shows the rich, and the not so rich, and their continuing drama. Mixing it in with all the British accents and the British wry humor makes it even better. Enter Netflix. Netflix has been my husband’s and my favorite TV savior for the past two or three years. Summer is a slow time for television unless you like reality shows, game shows, or oth...

I am calling for a text free weekend. No not a tax free weekend, like we have now, but going two days totally “text free”. Do you think we could survive a whole weekend without texting? My grandchildren would have to be admitted to the hospital for having a nervous breakdown. My son would be following right in their footsteps. So… walking down the street you could actually look at people as they walk by instead of bumping into them. Remember those days? Can you imagine going to a restaurant and seeing people actually talking?  Could they have a conversation for an hour without pulling out their phone? Heaven forbid. Some of the biggest text abuse occurs while waiting in line to give your order at a coffee shop. Ever have to wait for somebody in front of you to finish their texting so they can give the waitress their order? Many slow down the check out in the grocery line by finishing their texting before they place their goods on the conve...

Have you noticed that the world has become a big drive-thru? They took away the best part of summer the DRIVE-IN. There you could eat, talk and have no one tell you to shush. And you did not have to pay $8.00 for a bag of popcorn. And $5.00 or more for a soda. There should be a law against that. At the drive-in you could slouch, sleep, and take the kids, for free. So meanwhile you can drive through the bank, McDonald's, and Starbucks.  I think in California they even have drive-thru church services. Maybe have drive-thru funerals. How do you get a body through the window? Who dresses it? Ugh, let's change the subject. So at these drive-thru places you are at the mercy of the order taker. How many times have you gotten the wrong stuff? It's hard to check the bag when there are people honking behind you. And what if you cannot find your credit card or the right bills? People behind you have killed for less. How about the stores that make...

You are never too old to learn! Just found out our bedroom fan was going in the wrong direction! As a fan of all things cool in the summer I am sad for all the hot nights (no sex pun intended) that I have had with the air conditioner on full steam! Twenty five years of ignorance. That's a lot to bear! And hot steamy nights! (no sex puns! Did I say that?) When  I was a kid growing up we had box fans or window fans and I think they just went on and off. If you were wealthy you may have gotten a fan that had a high and low speed. I can't keep up with all these newfangled inventions!  If you were really rich you had an attic fan! I don't think our house   even had an attic. If it did I'm sure I would've gone up there... to hide! I would escape to our ugly unfinished basement. I did not know anyone who had a finished basement! It was cool and mom had some old rusty thing I sat in. Passed hours there avoiding prying eyes. The only thing missing from my pri...