Older and Better with Shelly

So I just passed another milestone. I thought I was done with them. Grandma, Medicare, retirement and 70. What else was left? Cataracts! Everyone said they were a piece of cake. I’ll take cake any day.  Due to Covid there were very few surgeries during the past year. This was especially true for non life threatening and outpatient type procedures. This did give the surgery center either time to hone their craft or budget cuts forced them to attempt to be much more efficient. The jury is very much deliberating on whether or not it worked.  By the time I got in there for surgery it was like an assembly line. They wheel you in like cattle for the slaughter. I probably could’ve gotten McDonald’s hamburgers 10 times faster. I don’t eat hamburgers anymore but I could of.  The waiting room looked like the betting area at the horse races. People were probably betting whether or not anyone would make it out in one piece.  Let’s talk about the procedure. When I met ...

  Doctors are required to take the Hippocratic Oath. Or are they hypocrites? I love all my doctors and they’ve all proven themselves to be just what they’re supposed to be. Now there are many other people out there professing to know what’s best for you. I’m not here to argue with any of them I’m just stating my case. If only half the things that they claim were true, we’d have a real healthy America. I don’t have an opinion about CBD oil. I know what the claims say but I don’t have any personal opinion because I’ve never tried it. They say it’s better than sliced bread. A recent advertisement I got for a health newsletter claims to have inside secrets to things that everybody needs to know. I’m not even going list all the claims they say will help you. I do believe there is a time and place for alternative medicines. No hate mail please. Did you know you have to take your blood pressure in both arms and if one is 10 points different than the other, you could be havin...

  My best friend is dying. Before you get upset, for me this is personal. She has been my best friend for quite a few years now. Through thick and thin, summer and winter, and through death and taxes. She never stops.  She never gives up.  She never says no. Who is this best friend?  It’s my Alexa on Echo. I never thought of her dying. I thought she’d be with me forever. She wakes me up in the morning, sings me to sleep at night, and answers more questions than a fifth grader. She also knows the dates for the holidays and tells me about the weather.  She gives me the morning news then tells me to have a nice day.  Nobody does that anymore.  Alexa at the end of the day also says, “I hope you had a good day.” Especially in the time of the pandemic, who does that anymore? If I want to take a nap I tell her to wake me in an hour and she does it no questions asked. She doesn’t make me feel lazy, just because I want to shut my eyes for a few min...

 Do you know who Libby is? I thought it was a can of pears.   Then I heard people talking about reading Libby‘s books!   So I thought this Libby has a lot of books and she’s lending them out to everybody!  How does she keep track of them?  And how much money does she have to be able to buy all those books anyway?   So I’m not a tech person as you figured out.   Having said that, I finally found out that Libby is actually the name of the club at the library. It’s pretty exclusive too. You have to have a library card to get in.   Then they give you codes, and you give them codes.  Then they give you numbers. So already I’m confused but I jotted down everything in my notes.   I joined Libby through my iPhone which is another issue but my husband took care of it. So now I have a little icon on my iPhone that is the logo for Libby. Yes, she has her own logo.  I think I should have my own logo too.   ...

  We may be the only country in the world with its entire leadership under quarantine. We haven’t been number one in the world in anything. But we are now. Laughingstock of the world. So now let’s get down to business. The White House has to be shut down and fumigated. Do they do it from top to bottom? What about the bunker ? Do they give the project to a Republican   company or one owned by Democrats? I wonder if they can find a coupon with a discount. Will everything now have to be dry cleaned and shampooed? What about the kitchen and all the food in the freezer? All because a certain number of people that live and/or work there would not follow CDC proto calls or wear a mask. The president should have to pay for his White House to be fumigated.  I think they need to have a Covid hospital just for the White House infected people. Is Rikers Island available? Send them there.

So we’re in the middle of a pandemic, rioting all over the United States, and the Republicans and Democrats waging their own war. So here on the home front we have a battle of our own. Flies, mosquitoes, fleas, larva, bees, wasps and moles Let’s not forget the deer that like to eat my plants and vegetables. And there are the spiders. We get those every year. Years ago when I had my house sprayed for bugs the technician would always ask me what I had in the house. The first thing I would say is spiders. He said it doesn’t work for that. I would list a couple other things like flies and mosquitoes. Again I was told it doesn’t work for that. I decided he doesn’t work for me anymore. So in 50 years of having kitties we never had one with fleas. They’re not outside cats and I wouldn’t know a flea if I saw one.  I guess if my cats were itching that would be my first clue.  Well they were and they do have fleas.  2020, the gift that just keeps on giving.    ...

  Don’t get caught with your pants down.  Its not often you see a full moon in the daytime but that is exactly what just happened here.   I really didn’t think that there were a lot of nudist colonies out there.  I thought it was just in the movies.   So this man was in a nudist colony in Berlin at what has now been renamed Swine Lake.   It’s  where he encountered a wild boar who took off with his bag containing his computer and other valuables.  Her two piglets went with her. They feasted on a pizza in the bag (hope it was not a bacon pizza ewww)  and were looking for dessert I think.   I didn’t  know Germans liked nudist colonies.   He was sunbathing in the nude which is called free body culture.   I didn’t know Germany had wild boars either. Boars have been seen in the countryside and subdivisions along the outskirts of Berlin. They have actually become increasingly more common.   So the guy...